Progress Report: I am Missing You To Death


I want to write, but I have nothing to say.

“These words are all I have so I write them,
I need them just to get by.”

Dance, Dance – Fall Out Boy

I want to catch up with blogs and commenting, because it feels like it’s been forever, but my brain just won’t cooperate.

It feels as foggy as the weather outside.

“I’m a young one
Stuck in the thoughts
Of an old one’s head
When all the others were just stirring awake
I’m trying to trick myself to fall asleep again.”

w.a.m.s – Fall Out Boy

Last night (okay, so it was really 2am), driving to get food, the fog was so thick I thought the Big Rig in the opposite lane was a Toyota until it was right next to me.

Maybe it’s because I actually have a lot to say, and I just can’t figure out how to say it.  Or what I would actually say if I did know how.  Or because I can’t say it to the person I want to.

“I wanna scream ‘I love you’ from the top of my lungs,
But I’m afraid that someone else will hear me,
You can only blame your problems on the world for so long,

Before it all becomes the same old song.”
The (Shipped) Gold Standard – Fall Out Boy

My thoughts feel like a knotted ball of yarn.  If only I could find just one loose end to tug on, maybe the rest would unravel and fall into place.

“I’m coming apart at the seams,
Pitching myself for leads in other people’s dreams,
Now buzz, buzz, buzz –
Doc, there’s a hole where something was.”
Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes – Fall Out Boy

But, I know you’re supposed to write even when you’re not feeling like it, just to see where it will take you…so here’s what I learned today about the color coral:

  • It’s considered the color of “Christ Consciousness” – sensitivity, love, awareness, intuition, compassion, and forgiveness.
  • It symbolizes connectedness and inter-dependence.
  • It represents taking responsibility for the situations in our lives, and promotes action for change.
  • Because of it’s specific blend of yellow and red, it contains both attributes of protection and acuity, and heightens your awareness when dealing with people who are likely to be dishonest.
  • Coral Reefs are actually made of hundreds of thousands of separate life forms that come together to create a whole.  Therefore, the color Coral represents the creation of communities and global oneness.
  • Those who are attracted to the color Coral tend to be good at resolving issues in relationships, or knowing where resolution is needed and taking action to achieve it.

Photo Credit:

Well, I wear a lot of coral, and that’s what color I painted my bedroom, so I guess this explains why I’m so drawn to it!

Anyways…that’s what I learned today, and I wrote about it…but I’m still feeling blah and inspirationless, so I think I’m putting my pen down for the day (“closing my computer lid” doesn’t sound quite the same, does it?).  Congratulations to anyone who stuck through to the end of this thing :P

What are your feelings on the color Coral?  Do you put any stock in the symbolism of colors, or do you just like what looks good to you, and let it go at that?

(Title also taken from a Fall Out Boy song – “I Slept With Someone From Fall Out Boy and All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me”)

7 thoughts on “Progress Report: I am Missing You To Death

  1. I like the colors I like, and am always fascinated when I discover what is associated with the colors. Especially when I suddenly am drawn to a color I wasn’t before. Good ole Universe! :-)

    I am always on the hunt for the perfect coral lip color – there is something equally soothing and lively about coral that I really like.

    For me, typically when I have nothing to say, it’s that I have too much to say. I love this line: “If only I could find just one loose end to tug on, maybe the rest would unravel and fall into place.” – I so understand that feeling.

    You’ll find your voice again. Maybe… you have to let yourself scream “I love you” – one good place is an empty school parking lot when school is out, windows closed, radio on… safe as can be. Or in the shower. Or whatever feels right and good to you. You will find your voice again. You will.

  2. The words WILL come, don’t force them. I went through days and days of self doubt and blahs, and I took the advice of fellow bloggers and just stopped thinking about it. My sense of HAVING to come say something went away and I started finding a great rhythm. When something moves or inspires you, come share it. People will wait until you are ready to jump in.

  3. I’m right there too. I have about 20 drafts saved just with a title and it seems too much work to put it all together now! I wrote about my need for yellow light recently. I go back and forth when it comes to how I feel about colour’s significance. Kinda like horoscopes – I believe them where they’re good, think they’re garbage when they’re bad! Haha.

  4. I don’t have much of a reaction to coral either way, although I enjoyed learning a little about it courtesy your post.

    I’m not sure whether I believe in color symbolism generally, but the descriptions I’ve seen for people who love green have seemed suited to me–more so at some times than others . . .

  5. ‘Those who know don’t have the words to tell,
    And those with the words don’t know to well.”
    ~Bruce Cockburn, Burden of the Angel Beast

    Coral is fine color. Organic and earthy. Used to be called peach!

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